Unlike a
traditional funeral, a
memorial service is a gathering where a casket is not present (although the urn with the cremated remains may be on display). A memorial service can be held weeks or even months after the death.
A memorial service can be held in a church, legion/service club hall, event centre, winery or somewhere of importance to the deceased and family. There is usually music, selected readings and a eulogy. Memorial services can be further personalized as a
celebration of life.
Rather than opting to do things "the same old way", many families today want to celebrate the life of a loved one. Many funeral service professionals see this change as one of the many contributions to social change made by "
Baby Boomers". The
National Funeral Directors Association notes, "As baby boomers age and find themselves having to plan funerals for loved ones and themselves, they are making funeral choices based on values that are different than previous generations. Baby boomers see funerals as a valuable part of the grieving process and are seeking ways to make them meaningful." If you too desire to make the funeral for a loved one more engaging and personally meaningful, a
celebration of life may be the perfect concept to build on.
As mentioned in the page
Traditional Funeral Services, there are basic components which make up the conventional approach to funerals:
- A Visitation with the body of the decedent present
- The Funeral Service with the body of the decedent present
- A Committal Service at either an earth grave/mausoleum crypt for placement of casket or urn grave or niche following the cremation
- The Funeral Reception (this portion is entirely optional and can be done in a variety of ways if so desired)
A traditional funeral is a series of events; it's a ritualized process where the deceased, and the attendees, pass from one social status to another; a process where the torn fabric of a family and community is repaired.
According to the online article "Six Characteristics of Helpful Ceremonies", by William Hoy, Director of Grief Connect, this is done by including:
- Symbols of shared significance intended to communicate beyond words
- Ritual actions shared by a group of individuals
- Gathered people providing comfort to one another
- Connection to heritage through recognized readings
- Increased physical contact between attendees provide comfort
- Witnessing the transition of the body through burial or cremation
In knowing these characteristics, you can design a Celebration of Life as unique as the life of your loved.
Our experience has shown us that many families today want more than a traditional funeral. This can be done by bringing more of the personality and lifestyle of the deceased into the arrangements. By displaying photographs or staging the event around a favourite pastime, a memorial service can become more personal and meaningful.
If a personalized memorial service suits the needs of your family, we suggest you consider the following questions:
- What did your loved one like to do?
- What was he or she like as an individual?
- What was their profession and how did that shape their life?
- Was your loved one spiritual?
- Was there a theme that you might be able to incorporate into the plans for the gathering?